Just Ask.

careers, Culture

Lean in, lean out, hang out, sit in, work out, meet up…geeze, by the end of the day you’ve made every geometrical which way around a social or networking circle, you may as well put yourself on the Auntie Anne’s menu as a pretzel and call it a day.

I’m really ready to call it a day, but I’m squeezing this out before doing some homework reading. It never ends! Homework, that is. I’ll probably have homework when I’m 87.

Back on track.

I think a lot of us, perhaps especially women, preface our questions by saying, “this may be silly, but…”, or “I have a stupid question”, or “sorry for asking, however”…

Psh! You know how everyone says there are no silly questions, only silly answers?

Is that a silly question, because you’ve very well heard that?

Well, it’s not even true, because there are some silly questions!

Well. Are you?

Well. Are you?

That’s totally ok. I’ve asked some questions that I thought were pretty lame, and received some pretty not lame answers in return.

I didn’t speak up as much when I was a kid.

Well, not so much. Apparently, when I was really little, and potty training, I asked an elderly woman how her deposit went on her way out of the bathroom. But once we obtain our social filters, we become afraid to ask questions.

Well, I’m glad I don’t ask people how their restroom visits pan out anymore, but I AM glad that I am not afraid to ask questions.

I think that doing theater and improv in high school helped with this. You’re given a few words, you can’t say no to anything in the scene, you just go with it! No negating. I’m a man from Texas and you’re in the mafia, and I just heard that we’re moving to Alderaan. Ok! I think this was actually a sketch I took part in during a Harold one night. Alternatively, the improv game where you have to do the whole scene in questions is helpful. A little contradictory, but I can do it. I can also keep a straight face for a long time, and sometimes people think I’m serious when I am just joking. I swear, this comes in handy for theater. Or in life.

Hey. Hello. Hi.

Hey. Hello. Hi.

So, when senior year of high school came around and I wanted to move on from High School World as fast as I could, there were many questions. I’m sure I’ve said this before, but I was down at the career services and guidance office in my school weekly. Can I apply to this scholarship? What do I need for this? This college lost my application, so I’m going to bug the crap out of them and get some answers. From questions.

Ok, I’m not The Riddler or anything, but I don’t think curiosity killed the cat. I think that cat stayed in a corner and was too shy to find out how to move and maybe never asked for help.

Want to get into that program but need a mentor to lend a hand? Ask!

Want to be more involved in something really awesome at work? Ask!

Want to see if the store will give you a discount, because there is a loose thread on that dress? Ask! (Seriously, I paid 1/4 the price for a dress at Anthropologie because of this. That stuff is expensive.)

Want to try La Mer because everyone raves about it but you have tons of skin allergies, and also it costs more than my groceries? Ask.

Want to know why a venue rejected your band? Ask. Or if you’re rejected from anything. A lot of people will, of course, be too busy to chat after said rejection, but I like constructive criticism. I’m going to critique myself anyway, may as well hear from someone outside my head who is more objective. I did this after job rejections…super helpful.

If your insurance isn’t covering something…you get it. Ask. I had an accounts manager at the hospital find an error from my insurance once when I inquired.

Of course, going crazy with the questions won’t be advantageous. I ask my cat a lot of questions.

Meow?

Meow?

No answers there.

Overall, I’ve learned of these outcomes from the ever-so-ready question.

One. Someone else was probably wondering the same thing, but was too afraid to ask. Sharing is caring!

Two. The person you’re asking didn’t know you were interested in the answer. Aha! A door has opened. They’ll appreciate your interest.

Three. There is no good answer or the person you’re asking doesn’t know, so now you may have made someone feel awkward, but you can both get to the bottom of it. Because nothing jumpstarts a next step like Awkward does!

Hence why I wrote this lovely post for CollegeXpress about…asking. How did you know?

You’re paying for college. Ask some questions to make it the experience you want.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m asking myself when I can go to bed.

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2 thoughts on “Just Ask.

  1. Reblogged this on Taryn Renay and commented:
    Some people need to ask all of the questions in order to gather all of the details.

    Being in theater helped me too, Farah! I’ll never forget that experience.

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